My Night Out on St. Patrick’s Day

Hello everyone!

So this past Friday (March 17, 2017) was St. Patrick’s Day, commemorating the arrival of Christianity in Ireland, and celebrating Irish heritage and culture in general…or at least that’s what Wikipedia told me. I could be very mistaken. If you are writing an academic essay about St. Patrick’s Day, please do not cite my blog, as it’s not a reputable source. I’m not even sure if the correct spelling of St. Patrick’s Day is “St. Patrick’s Day” or “Saint Patrick’s Day”.

Anyways, the point of this blog post is not to provide a history lesson on Irish celebrations (or any country’s celebrations for that matter). Instead, I will be reviewing my night out at the Ebar in Guelph, on St. Patricks Day.

Preface

Recently, I made some new friends; this is very exciting as a working adult because I’ve come to realise how much harder it is to make friends once you’re out of university, where there are clubs dedicated to meeting new people and bonding over common interests. My university even had a cheese club…I guess students felt strongly enough about cheese to form a club devoted to it? ANYWAYS, my new friends that I met at the local rock climbing gym, Grand River Rocks, invited me to go to a bar/club in Guelph on Friday evening and I decided what the heck, why not (also, my friend had agreed to be the designated driver so it was super convenient).

Phase 1 of “Operation Party on St. Patrick’s Day“: What to Wear 

Wearing green seems to be the popular choice for St. Patrick’s Day. However, I didn’t wear a green shirt because the one green shirt I own (that is not a spandex shirt intended for athletic pursuits) is pictured below:

14. St. Patrick's Day

It’s not the most comfortable shirt to wear…

Although I kind of wish I did wear it now…there are very few, if any, opportunities for me to wear this shirt. It’s a long story why I have it. The short version is my coworkers made it for me to wear at a work party.

Anyways, in the end, I went with blue jeans, a gray V-neck t-shirt and green sneakers. I know, I know. I’m quite the fashionista. “Comfortable” is my signature look.

On a similar note, I was really impressed with my friend who decided to wear white pants to the club. She is fearless, just staring danger in the face and laughing. She also probably wasn’t on her period. It’s not ideal to wear white pants while on your period, despite what’s advertised in tampon commercials – you know the ones where a woman on their period is laughing and running along the beach in all white? Periods definitely don’t feel like that. In fact, they feel like the exact opposite.

Phase 2 of “Operation Party on St. Patricks Day”: The Pre-Drink 

We first went to my friend’s partner’s friend’s house for some pre-drinks. My friend’s partner’s friend has these two really cute dogs so I was very distracted for the next hour or so. One beer and countless dog pats later, I was very red, very warm and ready to dance. This is usually not a good sign. I’m an awful dancer. We then piled back into the Jeep, stopped by Twice the Deal Pizza and then went into the Ebar. White pants friend managed to keep her white pants very white, even after eating pizza. We were ready to rumble.

Phase 3 of “Operation Party on St. Patrick’s Day”: The Club/Bar 

I’m not really a big fan of the clubbing atmosphere because it involves being close to a lot of potentially sweaty strangers in a dark, crowded space. However, the club is a very interesting place to people watch and show off my questionable-at-best dance moves.

Sure enough, I spotted that guy. That guy who was hitting on every woman he saw on the dance floor…it was painful and kind of fascinating to watch, like seeing a disaster unfold before your very eyes. I’m guessing he thought the law of averages, which is the “belief that the results of any given event “work out” or “even out” over a set of trials in the short run” (quoted from Urban Dictionary…again don’t quote my blog in your essay) applied. It was cringe-inducing, watching him first hit on a bunch of women, who were NOT interested in men to begin with. Why. Why do guys do this. If you are doing this, please stop doing this.

At one point, he was hitting on two women who were clearly interested in each other, and clearly NOT interested in him. Why you gotta go and try to ruin their chance at true love and/or a one night stand? What kind of thought process is “oh look, these two people are really attracted to each other and having a good time. I’m going to go and interrupt them.” It’s just not a good thought process.

Eventually, he found someone to mash faces with. I averted my eyes at this point because they were really going at it, against a wall. Maybe the law of averages is a real thing?

A few drinks and countless bad dance moves later (my dancing kind of looks like I’m just shaking/wiggling my limbs), we were leaving the club to head back to Kitchener/Waterloo.

Phase 4 of “Operation Party on St. Patrick’s Day”: Heading Back Home 

I almost fell asleep on the car ride back home.

Phase 5 of “Operation Party on St. Patrick’s Day”: Actually Back Home Now 

I actually fell asleep this time. At 3:00 am.

And that was my St. Patrick’s Day in Guelph. I hope you all enjoyed reading about my night! Until next time, dedicated readers 😀

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